Spivy Leeks

   Spivy Leeks was a drip of a man
   I met him washing dishes in a local cafe
   And he told me if...were fishes
   He'd steal all their scales and he ... away

   Spivy Leeks was an introvert
   Like a broken radio
   He'd make your day real long
   An end result, ... time he looked up women's skirt
   Just trying to figure out what was right from what was wrong

   He was looking for Jesus in all the wrong places
   There in my hole, save his soul
   Spivy Leeks, It's time to go home

   Spivy Leeks was an odd looking man
   He looks just like a pool table
   Shoved into jeans
   And he thought that he possessed a secret power
   And no matter what he did, he would be redeemed

   Spivy Leeks lived at the local 7-11
   He looked at dirty magazines most everyday
   He studied those pictures like he studied the Bible
   He thought that they were angels and that he'd been saved

   He was looking for Jesus in all the wrong places
   There in my hole, save his soul
   Spivy Leeks, It's time to go home

   Spivy Leeks robbed a liquor store
   Instead of a gun, he used a candy bar
   He told the cashiers that he was their saviour
   But his holyness, 
   His holyness and his Baby Ruth didn't get him very far

   Spivy Leeks died a glorious death
   Down on main street
   It was quite a public site
   And as Mr. Sheriff man was about to
   Blow him to pieces
   He said "Halejuhah, I'm coming home tonight."